What does the Bible “REALLY” say about sex? Contrary to popular opinion, the Bible does not condemn all intercourse outside of a monogamous marriage. There are numerous Scriptural examples that prove otherwise.
In a perfect world, every man would be deeply and intimately in love with every woman, and vice-versa. Humanity would not be ashamed of the beautiful bodies God created. “Clothing optional” would be a universal way of life.
In a perfect world populated by perfect people in perfect health, there would be no STDs. Death and aging would be a thing of the past.
In a perfect world, women would not be exclusive possessions of jealous husbands.
In a perfect world populated with perfect people living under ideal circumstances, there would not be any logical reason for any and every man not to make passionate love with any and every woman.
“Ah,” you say… “But this is not a perfect world.”
Astute observation, Sherlock. Nevertheless, perfection should be the goal of every Christian. We are commanded to become perfect, even as our Father in Heaven is perfect (Mt 5:48). This verse does not say, “Let’s wait until we all get to Heaven to live a perfect life.” Christians are not “children of this world who marry and are given in marriage.” Christians are citizens of Heaven who have been set free from the bondage of worldly marriage by our eternal husband¾Jesus Christ! Therefore, we should live as if we were in Heaven¾now! We should responsibly love one another with fervency. And depending on a wide variety of factors, that expression could and should include sex.
Jesus summarized the law with, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” This mandate stands in sharp contrast to the marital vow of “forsaking all others,” a concept nowhere in Scripture.
How do we determine whether or not it is ethical to have sex with someone? To put everything in a nutshell, we need to ask ourselves one question, “Taking into consideration all the pertinent variables, is having sex with this person in the overall best interests of everyone concerned?” In other words, am I doing unto others as I would have others do unto me? This Golden Rule can be applied to any ethical decision, sexual or non-sexual. If the answer is yes, then to not have sex with that person is a sin of omission. If the answer is no, then having sex under those circumstances would be a sin of commission. Speaking from my own personal experiences, I have more regrets over the sexual opportunities I have failed to take advantage of than the ones I have taken advantage of. I partially blame the legalists for turning me into someone M. I. A. (Missing Intimate Action). I also blame myself for allowing myself to become hoodwinked. Hopefully others will learn from my mistakes.
For our religious leaders to put artificial restrictions that go beyond the teaching of Scripture on the sexual conduct of their followers is sexual legalism. Probably the person the most guilty of this serious offence in the history of Christendom was Saint Augustine, although I would hasten to add that I certainly consider Augustine to be a great Christian teacher and perhaps the greatest of all time. I also consider men like John MacArthur, R.C. Sproul, James Dobson, Hank Hanegraaff, and others to be great and faithful teachers of our time. I also find them guilty of spreading false doctrines regarding sexual legalism. Since this matter is non-essential for salvation and because I believe they are sincere in their errors, I believe God will be very merciful towards them if they repent. But I am reluctantly pessimistic that they will change their errors even after this book has taken a total wrecking ball to their legalistic edifice. I hope and pray they will prove me wrong.
I believe I’ve made a compelling case for responsible non-monogamy. Of course, you’ll have to be the final judge of that. If your verdict agrees with my conclusions, then isn’t it about time you practiced what I’ve preached?
Knowledge without application is of no value. “Do not merely listen to the word, do what it says” (Jas 1:22). God knows we’ve been enslaved by sexual legalism for far too long.
Now is the time to put the power of love into practice. And while you’re at it, why not get this good news (not to be confused with the good news) out to your friends with a copy of this book?
We’ve discovered What the Bible “REALLY” Says About Sex. Now let’s experience the joy that comes from loving one another fervently, as Christ commanded. “Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them” (Jn 13:17).